No matter how good your suspension is weight will break it, well, weight and bad roads, so each one of your "just in case" and "I'll just take another" adds to the weight. spares are available and all you need is enough spares to get your to the next town..

There are more Land Rovers and Land Cruisers in Africa than there are in Europe (and no! that's a not a scientific fact its a guess) and they need spares, you'll remember looking for spares as part of the expedition, and if the worst comes to the worst get someone to courier the spare out to you and wait.

At worst you'll meet people whilst your waiting.

FOOD

See above for food spares, even dried pasta weighs heavy..

Take the spices your used to using in plastic containers or thick plastic bags well sealed

CLOTHES

Remember there are clothes available on the road, and clothes do weigh heavy,( yeah yeah I know I'm prattling on about weight again!)..get your self the best quality sweat absorbing t shirt you can afford, and for the females remember the sensibilities of Moslem countries, long skirts and covered arms are respectful and sensible.

MEDICAL

On our last trip we took along enough medical odd and sods to equip a small health centre (which we eventually did by giving them a way to a bush health centre in Zambia!)..and there is nothing wrong with that.

All I used was a dose of tetracycline (Don't ask why i needed a course of that !!!! ) which I could have got from a local pharmacy. This time I'll take bandages plasters, steri strips and alcohol wipes, Anti fungal cream and antiseptic.

TIDINESS

I know its boring but have a place for everything and keep it there. Its so easy to simply throw something in the vehicle because you can't be bothered to put it away..firstly it will eventually annoy, and there's enough to annoy you on the road and secondly it makes it easy for it to be stolen ( I still wonder where my mobile phone is that I always meant to take out from the door, and my Ray bans shouldn't have been left where the poor hitchhiker, whilst thanking me profusely for helping him, could steal it. Bastard!)

BEING NICE

Its nice to be nice

BUT

Giving presents indiscriminately may make you feel good but you're contributing in creating a dependent society, and when those following you don't give a present they are but one stage away from the dreaded stone throwing.

I'm not going to say don't give lifts, what I am going to say is that I am not giving any lifts... but then again I might!

PEOPLE & POLICE

I don't give bribes.. I smile act stupid (don't say it!) and am patient.. but I don't give bribes , it helps of course to be in the right, if the law says you need three warning triangles and you have two accept it and pay the fine (bribe!)

This is a difficult one, the trip is about people, other travelers, local people. But as a general rule when anyone approaches you they want something from you, and that something tends towards money..

That's fine! but always remember it, but just because they want something its still good fun to talk and the trip will be diminished if you don't meet and talk with new people

VEHICLE

I love the Land Cruiser its strong reliable and well built.. BUT LIKE ANY OTHER VEHICLE YOU CAN BREAK IT!! bad roads, too much weight (did I mention weight before?) but mostly poor driving will break it..

Mud plugging has its place in the grand scale of enjoyment but when your on the road kid gloves treatment is the safest and most comfortable.

GENERAL DRIVING & MECHANICS

Fill up with fuel when you can.. happiness is a full tank

No matter how competent the mechanics might appear they all seem to have a blind spot when it comes to putting a bolt into a hole correctly, and when its hard to turn they use their considerable strength to tighten it no matter that the thread is crossed , so be there with them, risk upsetting them and watch everything and don't be afraid to do it yourself.

That goes particularly for wheel nuts, it is SUCH good fun trying to undo an over tightened nut in the desert.

When you're in the desert cover every lock with insulating tape, and that goes for padlocks too.

Getting stuck in sand aint fun...specially when you don't want to.. learn the rules which quickly are:-

dig out well first time, don't skimp on it, dig out more than you think is necessary not less

decide if your going out forward or back

let down your tyres

engage low

take your time and drive out slowly

(To all you experts out there who are now saying "yes but...." that advice wasn't intended for you.. it was meant for people who do not have more sense than to get stuck in sand!!"

DON'T DRIVE AT NIGHT ever! ever!

CAMP FIRES

If you see wood on the road collect it , because there wont be any when you camp at night

CARNET

Right for those who don't know, a carnet is a document that you need in some countries to enable you to take the vehicle into the country, and it guarantees that if you don't export the vehicle then they can collect the duty that would be payable.

So the RAC guarantees that, if the country claims, that they will pay the amount on the carnet

Obviously the RAC need a guarantee that you will pay them back, they don't seem willing to accept

"Of course i'll pay you back do I look the sort of person who wouldn't?

and you do this by.. oh hang on there's something else.. the amount of the carnet is 100% of the value YOU (note the capitals) say he vehicle is worth..or 150% if your going to Senegal, or 200% if your going to Kenya.. or 500% if its Egypt. or 150% plus £5000 if its Australia.. so its a bit complex

So how much is your vehicle worth?

"£15000!"

"Nooo! again ! how much is your vehicle worth?"

"erm £10,000"

"how much?"

"£5000!"

"Better!.. clever explorer!!

"so no -one checks the value?"

"you got it!"

anyway...how do you guarantee to the RAC that if they pay you'll give them the money

(1) by lodging with the RAC an amount to cover the total value of the carnet up to a maximum of £10,000..they don't pay interest on it!!

(2) By taking out an insurance policy which will cost you 10% of the value of the carnet , but they will refund you 50% of that when you return without claiming

(3) By getting the bank to guarantee and they will require

(1) you to deposit the value of the carnet with them in an interest bearing account (3%!!!!!!..yippee)

(2)by taking a charge on your property (what property??)

Hang on there's still the charges by the RAC which amount to about £200 then your bank will charge you about £60 for the guarantee, and more if you have a charge on your house

No -one ever said it was gonna be cheap!

Of course if you really need to raise money for a carnet guarantee you could always sell the car!!

"but if you sold you're car you wouldn't need a carnet!"

"IT WAS A JOKE!!!!!!"

"oh? sorry I didn't notice that!"